So that got me thinking about Wicca and what they believe.  I remembered this funny Yahoo Answers question I stumbled upon one day.  This girl, who is apparently a practicing Wiccan, wants to know a spell to turn herself in to a mermaid.  She got a ton of funny responses about sure fire “magic spells” she could do in order to do this, all of them obviously making fun of her.

So I was thinking, “Do they REALLY believe in this stuff?”  Do Wiccans really believe they can curse entire cities, causing mass blindness?  Do Wiccans really believe they can transform in to other forms, including mythical creatures like Mermaids?  Because if they do really believe these things, holy shit are they stupid.

So I googled it.

Turns out, Wiccans are no different than Christians.  Just take away Jesus/God/Holy Spirit and replace it with Nature.  Take out Praying and replace it with Magic.  And *poof*, you have Wicca.

I know, that’s a huge generalization of both religions.  My point is that I’ve gone my whole life thinking witchcraft was just something super-duper-crazy people believed in.  It was obvious to me that “magic” does not exist.  You don’t see people turning in to frogs/mermaids/whatever.  You don’t see people flying on broomsticks.  But that’s not what Wiccans apparently believe.  At least, from the little effort I put in to looking to see what online Wicca communities have to say on this stuff.

What I found is that Wiccan “magic” is the same as Christian “prayer”.

I found lots of Wiccan pages that assert things like: “Sometimes spells work, sometimes they do not. Sometimes prayers produce results. Sometimes they do not.” and “Magic is not guaranteed. Neither is prayer to God.”

What kind of spells sometimes work?

• Spells to help someone get over an illness.
• Spells to help someone find a new job.
• Spells to help someone struggling through financial troubles.
• Spells to bring you extra luck throughout a day.
• Spells to help you come to the correct decision on an important matter.
• Spells for rain.

What kind of spells never work?

• Spells to transform in to mermaids.
• Spells to alter your appearance (i.e. change your eye color).
• Spells to restore an amputated limb.
• Spells that break the laws of physics (flying on a broom).
• Spells to read minds/teleport/etc.
• Spells to move mountains.

In fact, I even stumbled upon some “prayer chain” type sites/forums.  But instead of asking for prayer support, they were asking for spells to be cast for them.  Not “pray for my brother, he has pneumonia” but “cast a spell for my brother, he has pneumonia”.

All of these things can be said for prayer too.

What kind of prayers sometimes work?

• Prayers to help someone get over an illness.
• Prayers to help someone find a new job.
• Prayers to help someone struggling through financial troubles.
• Prayers to bring you extra luck throughout a day.
• Prayers to help you come to the correct decision on an important matter.
• Prayers for rain.

What kind of prayers never work?

• Prayers to transform in to mermaids.
• Prayers to alter your appearance (i.e. change your eye color).
• Prayers to restore an amputated limb.
• Prayers that break the laws of physics (flying on a broom).
• Prayers to read minds/teleport/etc.
• Prayers to move mountains.

So, are Wiccans crazy?  No, I can’t say they are any more.  Calling Wiccans crazy would be the same as calling Christians crazy.  And calling Christians crazy would mean that I myself at one point in time was crazy.  When I believed in the power of prayer, I do not believe that I was crazy.  I have a different view on it all now though, and I strongly believe that prayer doesn’t hold up to any of its claims.  But I understand why others do believe in it.

And so now, because of a Simpsons episode followed by some intense googling, I understand why people believe in the power of Wiccan magic.  Now I can rest happily that the question, “Do Wiccans REALLY believe that!?” is answered with, “No, no they don’t.”

But why, why do people believe in Wiccan magic/Christian prayer but not in storybook magic/miraculous prayer?  By “miraculous prayer” I refer to a prayer such as… restoring the limb of an amputee.  What is the difference between the two?  Why can you ask God for many things and seem to get them, but he refuses to grant requests for some things 100% of the time?  Why are there magic spells that seem to work, but others that fail 100% of the time?

To me, it seems awfully convenient that the magic that works “sometimes” is always magic that can not be easily falsified.  If magic ever works, that magic could easily be written off as a coincidence.  The faithful, however, believe that it was “more” than just a coincidence.  If the magic is done in a way that leaves no chance for coincidence, the magic always fails.  (I’m using magic here to be an all encompassing word for Wicca/Prayer/Positive Thoughts/etc.)  So anything outright and bold such as matter transformation/matter generation/breaking the laws of physics, or even not so bold claims done under properly run/double blind/placebo controlled studies, is on the list of things that never work.

So obviously all of these magic based faiths only work if the chance of coincidence is not removed.  The question, “Can ‘magic’ do the impossible?” Is answered with “Yes, if you leave room for coincidence.”  For instance, someone is diagnosed with a horrible form of cancer.  They get magic support and go for a 2nd opinion a week later.  Miraculously, there is no cancer.  Magic?  Or did the first physicians just give a wrong diagnosis?  The true nature of such kind of uses of magic is revealed by properly run studies on the medical benefits of prayer.  They all confirm that prayer has no medical benefit.

I’m happy to find that Wiccans don’t honestly believe that with the right spell they can turn in to a mermaid.  And I’m happy that I’ve come to understand that Wiccans aren’t really all that different from Christians.  I make comparisons between the two only because I am deeply familiar with Christianity, having been a Christian for a large part of my life.  Not because I wanted to “lower Christians to the level of Wiccans”.  I’m not lowering anything, I’m raising my own thoughts on Wiccans to the level of Christians.

I already did a bunch of blasphemy the other day when I made it clear my feelings on Jesus.  I can’t really top that.  Even though it’s quite tame and no where near aggressive (which makes it quite ridiculous that I lost a friend over those very thoughts, or so he claims), my respect for others beliefs does stop me from going further.  But I can point out that you can substitute any of the following for “Jesus” in that list of 10 things I personally believe are better than Jesus.

I believe those things I listed are better than:

• Mohamed
• Yahweh
• Vishnu
• Flying Spaghetti Monster
• Zeus
• Buddha
• The Pope
• Mother Teresa
• The Universal Life Force Theta
• Mother Mary

There are many others, but I think that covers the big ones.  With a shout out to Zeus.

Did you know that it is illegal in many countries to commit blasphemy?

In Ireland, blasphemy is prohibited by the constitution and carries a maximum fine of €25,000. A controversial law was brought into law on 9 July 2009 making blasphemous libel a crime for material “that is grossly abusive or insulting in relation to matters held sacred by any religion, thereby causing outrage among a substantial number of the adherents of that religion; and he or she intends, by the publication of the matter concerned, to cause such outrage”.

And here is a few of my favorite forms of blasphemy:  humor!

Keyboard Cat Blasphemy!

Jesus and Mo

And one last link over to Mr. Deity!

That’s about it for me, I’m blasphemed out.

Today, while out grabbing some lunch, I was handed a card by an nice and calm old man.  It was the perfect example of what I’ve been reflecting on lately.

Truth is Not Relative

Skipping over the obvious flaws in what this card is selling: Seriously?  You want to claim that the “Truth” in the Bible is fully accurate, unchanging and relevant to today?  Including all 10 commandments?  OK, next time you work on the Sabbath I get to throw the first stone…

Oh, and “Man evolved from animals”?  Haha!  Seriously, you need to go read at least the basics of Evolution.

The parts of this card that made them relevant to my reflection on my life post-God are a bit disturbing:

• You do not know what is right and wrong. (Proverbs 21:2)
• You are sinful. (Romans 3:23)
• You alone are not worthy. (John 14:6)
• You are not a good person. (Matthew 19:17)

Quite a motivational message isn’t it?  And when I was a Christian I took it to heart.  I fully believed that I was flawed and incapable of improving beyond a certain point.  I was always going to be in need of a savior, for I am sinful, unworthy, ignorant and just not good enough.

There were several major points in my life when I broke down sobbing over sin.  Sin that hurt no one except an imaginary God.  I was always trying to follow what I believed was right and wrong based off my faith, not of my heart.  I was constantly trying to be who God wanted me to be, not who I was.  I clearly remember several emails I wrote to my best-email-pal ever, Melody.  In these emails I was distraught and confused…  Constantly feeling like I was two-faced.  One person on the outside that everyone knew, another on the inside that only a few knew.

So for me, to finally shed all my faith and be the good person I know I am, my 10 year anniversary of this transformation is important.  My life has been so much happier, so much more “blessed”, and so much more sane, ever since I ditched God.

1. Married a wonderful friend
2. Janelle – Daughter
3. Kincaid – Son
4. Travis – Son
5. River – Son
6. Most of the pregnancies were extremely difficult, yet each baby was born healthy and is healthy now
7. I have not gone a single day without work.  Surviving countless layoffs and actually being laid off twice

Would my life had gone the same path with God?  Hard to say.  But I can definitely tell you, these have been the best, happiest and most blessed 10 years of my life.  We did it all, Jillian and I, with no help from God.  We are good enough, we know in our hearts what is right/wrong and we are sin free.

Just about everyone thinks of Christianity when the subject of morality comes up. You get looked down upon for doing immoral things and praised for avoiding immoral things. But… I’ve been thinking lately how messed up Christian morals really are. They change with society… with what is accepted by the masses. It’s almost like the Church gives in to peer pressure.

• It used to be immoral to eat pig. Now you can eat all the bacon you want.
• It used to be immoral to work on a Sunday. That’s OK now, work away 7 days a week.
• It used to be immoral for a woman to have a position of authority over a man. Now it’s immoral to consider that immoral.
• It used to be moral to own a slave. Now it is extremely immoral to own a slave.
• It used to be immoral to use birth control. Now it’s debatable, but more often than not it’s accepted as moral now.
• It used to be immoral to believe the Earth to be round.
• It used to be immoral to believe that the Earth was not the center of the universe.

There are probably more examples of morals drastically changing, but that’s a good enough list for now.

So here’s a new one for you:

• It used to be immoral to be a homosexual.

It’s the next step in the evolution of Christian morals. Several states have taken the lead in making gay marriage legal. Soon all the rest will follow. Soon the masses will all agree that homosexuality is not immoral.

Hard to nail down soon to a more specific time frame though. I bet you though, some day in the future someone is going to be told “You know, the Christian church used to be anti homosexuality.” And they’re going to be all “What, really!? You have to be joking…”

The Clintons are staying at the hotel across the street from our office building.

There are a ton of people along the 16th street mall. And for every civilian, there is a cop or private security guard walking amongst them. There are packs of 10-20 cops on bikes/horses that seem to go up and down the street.

The booths… all over. They’ve all got some political purpose… Except maybe the Obama Jama booth that just seemed to want to play Reggae music and chill. One strange one seemed to be preaching the joys of magnetism? There has to be more to these, I just know what I’ve seen while walking to/from the bus station with my iPod music going.

I haven’t been hit up once (which is amazing for 16th street mall! I’m looking at YOU green peace!) yet for saving trees/children/homeless. And I haven’t been hit up for spare change, something to eat, or even caught sight of anyone who would want to beg for such things.

But today, I saw on the corner, surrounded by a pointing/laughing/giggling crowd (and a ton of bicycle cops), a group whose sole purpose seems to be to hate.

But… given any political position that you want to rally for… let alone a position that is deeply rooted in ugly hatred… wouldn’t your message be completely lost if the reaction of the majority of your audience was laughing? Not laughing with you. Laughing AT you.

Yes, I’m talking about pure righteous Christian hate. Is there any other kind of political protest that is rooted in ugly hatred? I really can’t think of any that doesn’t have something to do with Christianity (at least here in the US). And with Christian ugly hatred protests, you know it’s most likely about homosexuality.

There was a man standing on some kind of soap box, attempting to shout things. But they were lost, completely, on everyone watching. Everyone was cracking up, pointing, laughing, and getting out cameras, because the biggest most profound sign in the group said “Homo-sex is a threat to national security”.

Flickr photo found from Just Back’s photo stream, click the photo to view the stream:

So I applaud these protesters, for they have successfully failed at spreading their message. If anything they have just convinced masses of people walking by on the 16th street mall today that they themselves are idiots and should not be listened to.

So I started to google about some bible passages I remembered from when I was a moral Christian.  And I discovered some differences between my morals and the morals the bible teaches me:

• Slavery.  By slavery I mean: purchase of another human beings life against their will.
  • Bible is pro slavery.  In some cases all descendants of one person who committed a pretty minor offense were forced in to slavery.  Not only is the Bible pro slavery, but it has many rules for slavery.  Such as beating your slaves.  As long as you hold off on your slave beating just enough so that the slave doesn’t die for 2 days, God’s OK with it.
  • I’m anti slavery.  And I’m anti beating anyone at all.  Even if it takes 3 days for them to die.
• Sex
  • The Bible has some weird rules about sex.  Not much of it is actually explicitly laid out.  One story I find interesting is Genesis 38.  In this chapter we learn that Judah marries some girl and has 3 sons.  He arranges a marriage with the first son and a woman, but for some reason God didn’t like him and killed him.  So Judah makes his next son take that woman for his wife and demands kids.  His son has respect for his brother though and “spills his seed on the ground” instead of inside his dead brothers wife.  Well… God will have none of that, so God kills him!  Later on we find that this same woman, who was married to two of Judah’s now dead sons, dresses up like a prostitute and Judah pays her for the goods.  Well… what do you know, Judah gets the ex-wife (a prostitute he paid for) of his two dead sons pregnant.  And…. God kills him?  No.  God’s OK with this.  So what do we learn from this?
    • Unprotected sex with hookers is OK.  God will not kill you.
    • Taking precautions to prevent pregnancy is not OK.  Having sex WITH YOUR WIFE and trying to prevent a pregnancy will piss God off so much he might just kill you.  But… when was the last time you saw God smote someone?  When was the last time you saw God do anything?
  • I say educate and be safe. Sex has many possible consequences and as long as you’re ready to deal with the possible consequences you’re probably ready for sex. Keeping in mind that no birth control/condom is 100% effective. Also unprotected sex with a hooker who is the widow of two of your sons is NOT OK.
• Equality
  • All people are clearly not equal in the bible.  No equal rights for everyone.
  • I believe all people are equal and should therefore have equal rights.  Color of skin, religious beliefs, sexual preference, whatever.  We’re all equal.
• Animal Sacrifices
  • Bible is pro them.  God often request animal sacrifices in the old testament.  He seems to lust for spilled blood and the smell of burnt flesh.  He even goes as far as convincing one of his loyal followers to sacrifice their OWN SON.  Sure, he stops him right before he actually does it, but that doesn’t make it any less of an asshole thing to do.
  • I like eating hamburgers/chicken/steak etc.  I’m not a vegetarian or anything.  But sacrificing an animal in some sort of ancient blood ritual and burning their flesh… yeah.  Not for me.

Now I know that the new testament changes many things.  But remember it’s the same God throughout all of time.  The same God that Christians worship and call loving is this same God that kills individuals for minor infractions, the same God that wipes out entire populations of people, the same God that kills innocent babies in Egypt because of something the Pharaoh did.  So if we’re talking about Morals instilled upon us from the Christian God, you have to look at the whole bible.

And I know that these are not the morals that Christians today stand by.  Well… some of them are.  It’s hard to find a Christian that believes we’re all equal.  I have some wonderful friends that are Christian and I don’t think any less of them.  It’s just that for me it goes against my nature to follow these rules in the bible.  For me I felt more like I was sinning when I tried to follow what the new testament told me.

I’m just nicer than what the bible will allow me to be.

Now, I said,  “than what the bible will allow ME to be”.  Not that I’m nicer than all Christians.  I fought hard throughout college with what I felt the bible told me was right and wrong.  Others have different views on what is literal and what is not.  Or how one passage translates.  Or what is still valid for our modern culture.  You can come to many conclusions about what it means to be a Christian.  For me, the conclusions I have came to, I will never be Christian again.

Guess that brings up the question, “where do morals come from?”  I think it’s just a sense of what’s right and wrong instilled in us to keep order.  Some evolutionary scientists probably have some theories on it.  But if we all had no morals, no feelings, no empathy… we wouldn’t make it very far as a society.

And morals clearly change throughout time.  Which to me is a clear sign that morals are NOT from a divine superior unchanging perfect being.  Slavery used to be moral.  Racism used to be moral.  I know most people consider homosexuality to be immoral.  But some day I bet the majority of the world will accept gay marriage as equal to straight marriage.  Some day homosexuality will be moral.

I like to think that I don’t just follow the masses.  Who knows though, maybe there’s something in my life that I find “morally acceptable” will be so obviously not acceptable to future generations.

The gist of the post is that everything in the world is going so wrong so where in the world is God? It’s very obviously talking to the Christian God, even though it is addressed to Buddha and even Oprah. I know all the typical Christian responses to her questions/complaints, since I was a Christian and even went to a tiny Christian college for 3 years of my life. It’s not so much her complaints that I found interesting, but the responses.

All the Christians are responding with the same basic response: “that’s not God’s fault, that’s sin’s fault. We sin because of free will. Free will is a good thing. God is love, not hate.” Here’s one quote in particular: ‘god’s will is never hatred. in fact the scriptures say that “god is love”.’

It’s that part that caught me: ‘god’s will is NEVER hatred.’ And I think that has a lot to do with the whole losing faith, becoming agnostic, drifting closer and closer every day to atheist. The statement is clearly false. The Old Testament in particular is pretty damning evidence that God’s will does involve hatred.

Instead of looking for examples, I googled some. Now I know, this website is clearly biased and full of crazy anti-christian loonyness, but just use it for the scripture references. Please again, just use it for the references to scripture and what God did in that scripture. Warnings over, here’s the link.

Anyway… those are my late night thoughts while I waited for my oven to finish self-cleaning so I could sleep without worrying about the apartment burning down. As random and jumbled as they may be, my point last night was that God is not just love. God is pretty damn mean and cruel at times and the Bible has plenty of examples of him being mean and cruel.